Overall, parenthood has been a delightful experience- however we definitely experienced a few bumps. I remember the first few weeks, where Justin and I would alternate between thinking we had this whole parenthood thing down, to being terrified when people would tell us "just wait, it gets worse" (my experience has been that as the girls have gotten older, they have also become easier to care for).
The first 3 months were definitely the hardest- with a few of the biggest challenges in the first week. Having Audrey whisked off to the nicu before I even had a chance to see her was absolutely horrible. Justin went to be with her, so as I was in recovery I had lots of questions for the nurses, but no answers (just the statement that no news was good news... which ended up being true, but still it was quite frightening). I wasn't able to meet Audrey until she was about 12 hours old (I had some major fainting spells and other fun complications). Everything I had ever heard about attachment disorder was running through my head. Plus I was upset that she needed formula- joys of being a neurotic new mom.
The day after we were discharged from the hospital, Audrey was admitted to the peds unit for jaundice. Having to leave Claire was so hard (she was in the capable hands of my mom, but I was still a nervous wreck leaving her at home).
Things were going better for a while, but at 5 weeks I had the devastating diagnosis of postpartum psychosis. I was so anxious that something would happen to the girls- I was compulsive about their swaddle (true story, if anyone else swaddled one of the girls, I would sneak in and redo it to my standards).
Anyways, at 7 weeks things started to turn around, and once the girls were about 10 weeks old I definitely felt like I had this mom thing down. At a year, I couldn't be much happier. Sure, we still have a few things to work on (like sleeping through the night and mastering the sippy cup) but overall I think our little family is doing great. I suspect that it is about 25% parenting skills and 75% the girls' temperament (we've been told on several occasions that we have angel babies) but the four of us make a great team.
I know we will have tantrums and challenges ahead of us, but I feel equipped to handle them (it probably helps that my coworkers are some of the best child therapists in the city and I have access to all of their wisdom). So take home from this rambling post... while we faced a bit of adversity, the first year of parenthood was better than I expected. I've said to Justin more than once that we must have done something good to get Claire and Audrey for our daughters.
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